Immediate Steps You Can Take to Control Anger

 

Our CD on anger reduction and relaxation will guide you in lowering your frustration and anger responses.

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Be aware of physical and mental cues. When you become angry, your body’s “flight – fight” response kicks in and the adrenalin flow increases for your protection. Your heart rate increases, your face and neck begins to flush, and your muscles may become tense. If this occurs, you need to back away physically and emotionally before the situation escalates to the explosive state. If your mind is thinking about how you’re going to win this argument at any cost, you have probably gone too far – again, back away.

Breathe deeply. Allow more oxygen to get in your system for a calming effect. The more oxygen you take in, the less stressed you feel. Keeping your mouth closed, gently push the stomach out, saying to yourself, “I am breathing in calmness and relaxation.” Hold the air to the count of five and slowly, gently release it through your mouth. Do this a minimum of three times in succession.

Scale your anger’s intensity. Rate your angry response on a scale of 1 to 10, where 1 is “calm” and 10 is “explosive.” As your anger escalates, ask yourself “Is this worth it?” When you look at whether this incident warrants being so upset, almost invariably you'll find that the incident in question was of little importance in the scheme of things.

Engage in self-talk. Talk yourself down from being angry. Tell yourself to calm down, relax, it’s not worth it, this is ridiculous or whatever words work for you.

Use calming visual imagery. Close your eyes and pretend you are in lush green woods by a beautiful brook. Try to see the details of trees, bushes, animals, and water. Feel the coolness of the shade or the warmth of the sun as you sit and watch the water flow over the rocks, heading downstream.

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